Grabble Grabble Grabble

After serving for the past 8 months, I've come to a profound realization: People suck. There are those 'gems' out there that love to complain, thus love making your life a living hell at their expense. This concept was embodied by a rather large lady I had the privilege of serving a few nights back. Here's the run-down...

There were six middle aged women, all of which looked a little on the trashier side so I wasn't expecting much (Yea, yea, that sounds mean, but you learn to trust your superficial instincts). From the start, they seemed nice enough. It was Martini night so they all got a round of martinis and some salads and whatnot. One select, aforementioned lady wanted a straw for her water. I was pretty busy so I forgot to bring it the next time around. Whatever, she'll live. Finally I remembered to bring it and I joked, "About time, eh?". She laughed and said something, I can't really remember.

So by the time they were on their second round, it was about 11, and my manager said I could be cut. With that, I went to their table and told em I was about to leave so they could close out with me or I could transfer their tab to the bar. They decided to close out. I brought them their check, they gave me their cards, I ran 'em, and brought 'em back. I decided to go by the table and swipe their closed out checks because they were taking forever to get up. I get back to the computer and realize I am one check short but wasn't too concerned since I figured it was hidden somewhere on the table, plus I was just pissed because they all were God-awful tippers. I went back after they left to look for it. I found it. It was face down, halfway hidden. I turn it around and NOT ONLY did the lady leave me roughly 9%, but on the top corner, the ticket read 'Pretty bad service...'.

Listen here Plus Sized (oooo...too mean?), I understand I was a little busy so I'm sure my service may not have been pristine, HOWEVER, if it was TRULY that bad, why not tell me? Or not tip me at all? Or just leave it at the 9% tip? That obviously sent a pretty clear message. You realize I have 20 other drunk people that want my undying attention and service that I have to tend to. You realize I'm making 2.13/hr so tipping a dollar on a $20 or $25 tab is a travesty. You realize that writing 'pretty bad service' does nothing productive, in fact, it just makes me resent a-holes like you THAT much more. Wait no, resent isn't a fair verb. I think loathe is a little more appropriate.

If I was addicted to nicotine, YOU'D be the reason I smoke. If I was an alcoholic, YOU'D be the reason I drink. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for making my work-life that much harder. I hope you're not like this in other aspects of your life, or else you are going to be a very lonely, lonely person.

I think there's some traffic outside. Go play in it.

PEACE,

Brian