O dear...

***First and foremost, I must warn you. This is written while, shall we say, 'under the influence'. But hey, it was wine night. What do you expect? You can't hold it against me. I just feel it necessary to give you, my loyal readers, a heads up. Take this post with a grain of salt, as they say (or five glasses of wine...actually, 4 glasses of Malbec and one very FULL glass of Pinot Noir..this did it for me. It's whatever you're in to). Enjoy.***



I need a business card.



I found out today that I, along with my bro' from another mo', will be giving a presention to a group of very important people about a world renown artist...or something like that. I'm not exactly sure who we're presenting to, or what we are even presenting about, but rest assured, we are basically a freelance ad agency.



So be jealous. I'm about to hit the big time. (more details to come...as they arrive).


***I just found this from a few nights ago. I thought the intro was awesome.

Polar

Given my previous post...I feel it necessary to post something a bit more, shall we say, up-beat? I clearly stated something I hate. So what is something I like? That's a dumb question to ask. It's an ice breaker at some sort of orientation that's usually followed by "Um...I dunno. I just like hanging out with friends and like, relax with my friends and watch Glee (or whatever new hip tv show you may be watching)."

So what is something I truly and thoroughly enjoy?

I'm not gonna say music because that's a given. If you know me, then you know my feelings towards music.

I got it. I like...no. I love...no. I would put my life on the line for (cue roll)...
...
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Wait.

Laundry is done.

SUCKAS

They See Me Rollin'...

***As a preface, this post is not meant to be uplifting...so if you're one of those 'look on the bright side' type of person, this may not be a leisurely read.***



I hate traffic.

I hate traffic lights. I hate stop signs. I hate other drivers.

I hate traffic.

Maybe it's due to my impatience, or my lack of optimism, but it is what it is. There is nothing fun; nothing enjoyable, about driving in traffic. I'm a completely different person when I'm behind the wheel. It's actually pretty terrifying. You can actually see my eyes turn to a deep, souless black as I buckle in.

Something about driving stresses me out. If I hit a red light, I instantly think "Man. This sucks. Could this light be any more inconsistent and biased against me?". If another driver is going slow, or is doing something I don't think they should be doing, I make it very apparent that I am not happy. Stop signs? They decrease gas mileage. I do stop, however. I can't afford a ticket BUT I still hate them.

I'm generally a very pleasent person outside the car, in every day life, so don't let this post fool you. Everyone has their pet peeve and mine is driving with idiots. There are times where I feel bad because maybe the moron behind the wheel isn't a moron at all. Maybe this person's situation warrants his lack of driving ability or general cognative activity. Maybe the wife is pregnant or maybe it's an emergency. These 'special occasion' scenarios do run through my mind as I fume with anger, but I figure that chances of them actually needing to drive like they're the only one on the road is slim to none. So they..can suck it.

Again, don't try to use some clever, positive, Mr. Brightside mentality on me. I'm set on my ways. I'm doomed to life full of mild road rage and empty, unwarranted rage to a complete stranger. It's not fair to them, no. But I don't care. Everyone should just read my mind and drive like I want them to. It shouldn't be that hard.

Wooooo sah....

There's the charm

I'm driving down 6th street here in town (Lawrence) and I see this guy coming up in the opposite lane in a tractor. Nothing special. Then I see he's standing. Why would a guy driving a tractor in the middle of traffice be standing up? Well you see, he was standing out of necessity because how else are you gonna adjust yourself effectively? That's right people...Farmer Jon was playing pocket pool in the broad daylight, in the middle of traffic, while on a rusted tractor.

God bless America.

On Love...

Gross.

I'm not exactly one to write on relationships but something struck a bit of a nerve tonight at work. It was horrifying. It sucked the hope out of everything good and decent. It. Was. Aweful. I couldn't help myself from staring. Here was this older couple (mid 50s) sitting together over a nice steak meal...and I mean nice. Steaks don't run cheap where I work. So yea, here they are sitting together over a meal and they are both ON THEIR PHONES! WTF? I understand if one of them glances at their mobile device BUT they were on their respective phones for at least 15 minutes straight, without so much as looking at each other. What a sh*t relationship. According to their server (my friend), that is the only basis for conversation. That's right. The pics and the GIF's and the LOL's on their phones were the only thing that sparked conversation among the two 'supposed' lovers.

WHAT IS HAPPENING TO SOCIETY???

This 'lack of face to face communication' wasn't supposed to set in until the generation preceding me came of age. What happened to this relationship, that they had to resort to such a ridiculous device in order to keep their 'relationship' alive?

I'm not one to say.

BUT. I can say, with every confidence, that whatever they have going on is not love. If they have nothing to talk about...then so be it. If they are truly soul mates, then they should be comfortable with the silence. In fact, they should embrace it. They should know that the lack of verbal communication is not a slight to their partner, nor is it anything personal. It's an affirmation that they know they don't have to say a word, yet they know what each other is thinking. Maybe not word for word...but they have a general idea.

It's sad to think that such a couple, whom I'm guessing has been together for quite some time, have to resort to such tactics in order to escaper their reality. A solid relationship should be your escape from your everyday shinanigans that you find yourself in. Your significant other should be your safety net. It should not be an everyday struggle. I think this is why alot of couples split. They feel the pressures of outside influences (which may lead back to Proximity??--who knows) and think they need to make it work. Some say a relationship takes work. I say, if it's meant to be, the relationship is fine where it is...it's the individual that needs the work.

A relationship shouldn't be forced. It should form out of what the two individuals find most important. Whether it be communication, networking, and/or, where they see themselves in the future...a relatinship is only as strong as the weakest link.

I dunno...I just thought it was sad to see such a seemingly happy, old couple sit down to a depressing, reality-checking (is that a word?) meal.

I hope this doesn't happen to me...or anyone I know. Because this...this is a distortion of what a loving relationship should be. This is fake and destructive.

I'm not one to say what your relationship should be but this (this old couple) is not it.

Soooo....best wishes out there!

-Brian